Freaky Friday

I am starting a new thing where I write about a childhood memory once a week, it was going to be memory Monday but that title sounded to soft and happy for what it was for. The reason it is called freaky Friday is because I am sure when my parents find out some of this stuff they are going to freak... I am not throwing myself to the sharks because obviously there are things they will never know because siblings have a secret pact that comes standard with being a Sorensen. So don't worry Mitch, I wont tell mom about the time you lit her curtains on fire because they said they were extremely flammable and you thought that meant fireproof. So here you have it, freaky Friday.

It was in the days where video camera's didn't come in nano sized but in large, extra large and "you will never get this out of your house" sized. Our parents were on their weekly date (lets get away from the kids while we still can) night. Whenever they did this, Tales from the Crypt and the video camera became our best friend. Not because we weren't allowed to use it when they were home, because we were free to use it at anytime, we just weren't free to drop it on accident without breaking my dads heart and causing him to mumble obscenities when they were. On this particular night we decided to host the first annual Sorensen Grammy Awards where each of us kids picked a song to lip sync too and "Perform" on stage. I believe Sarah was the host and she quite possibly sang a Mariah Carey song because she was wearing her satin pink dress that was sure to steal any mans heart and any girls ego. I tastefully chose a song by Brandy because I had the look and the moves... actually I am the complete opposite from her but Sarah said whoever was Brandy had a free access pass to her Jynco jeans and those were like Disneyland in a clothes form. Those would boost me up on the social ladder quicker than arriving to school on a ten speed. Shanna chose to sing "Spider Webs" by No Doubt. She didn't know the words but she looked like Gwen Steffani's 7 year old version so no one cared. For the winner of the night, Mitchell. When Mitchell was younger he always had a fetish with stealing the princess dress up shoes, wearing the tiaras and telling everyone he would like one lump in his coffee and his dry cleaning by noon. Mitchell also had a fetish with Madonna, I mean it isn't like we had a choice because that CD was always on repeat in my dads car along with Heart and Chicago. So as expected, he chose "Secret" by Madonna. However for his stage name he was Grandmadonna because he had glasses and when you are young, the only people that wear those are you grandparents and Santa Clause. So there Mitchell was, busting all the unmentionable moves on camera while wearing a white mullet wig, lipstick, a pink bathrobe and princess heels. He would make any father proud. Of course my parents have seen it and now we all end up in tears every time we watch it but I think that when my dad came home to his son dressed like that while painting his nails, he went straight to his room and prayed promising he would get rid of every AC/DC record he owned in turn for a son that doesn't scrub, exfoliate and repeat.